DocBand = GUILT

I would consider this (the DocBAnd) the first big "Hill" we have had since Nathan was born. I was told and knew to expect alot of things when he was born. Sleepless nights, a whole new kind of love, a lifestyle change, ect. but I never knew how much guilt came with a baby. (more on that to come)

This past week Nathan received his DocBAnd. It is a helmet he has to wear for 3 months for his misshaped head (plagiocephaly). We struggled as to what the right decision was for him. He was diagnosed with moderate form of plagiocephaly and we had the option of doing nothing, it would not get better on it's own, his head would just remain the same shape, or place him in a helmet. Of course we had to weight the PRO's and CON's and prayed about it.

THE CONS: COST (insurance would not cover it b/c they consider it cosmetic), having to wear it for 3 months 23 hours a day, people staring, not knowing if it would produce much result since he is a little older, I was worried about personality changes and a fussy baby.

THE PROS: His head would be more symmetrical. It would help correct the flatness to the left side. It would get more length in his head, as it is very wide compared to long. We also do not want him to be teased when he is older about the shape of his head.

What sold us was 2 things. 1st,We had friend at work who's daughter wore one and she showed us before and after pictures and you could tell a big difference AND 2nd, they told us he may not ever be able to wear a bike helmet properly because of the shape of his head (that sold Dan right then and there!!!)

So the journey begins. Usually they are fitted and placed on babies as young as 3 months and they like to have it placed by the time the baby is 6 months old but they will treat with a helmet up to 18 months old. By the time we made the decision, had him fitted, a 2 week wait for the helmet to be constructed, Nathan is well into his 7th month by the time he officially received his helmet.

Here was picture of him the day he received his helmet. He looks so happy and totally oblivious to what is about to happen. Yes, I cried, I just felt so guilty about putting something unnatural on his head that I assumed he was going to hate.

I forgot (maybe I was in denial) to take pictures of his helmet when he first got it. This picture was on day 4. When they first put it on he did not seem to mind it so much. By he second night he was much fussier. Day 3 was pretty rough. HE was just fussy and pulling at hte helmet (yes, I was crying alot) Poor thing. Here he was suffering and I could easily stop the suffering. Tha is why I feel so guilty. This was a choice we made for him. It is not medically necessary or required. I think it would be a lot different if he was in a spica cast (when a baby breaks a femur they have to put a cast on both legs with a bar going between the legs, it is very cumbersome to deal with) or something because that would be medically required and needed.

On the 4th night we took the helmet off for his 1 hour break, to bathe him and to clean it and below is a picture of what we saw.

A horrible blister that was oozing. Talk about more guilt, we basically had caused this to happen to him.(lots of tears from mom). No wonder he was fussy and pulling at the helmet. We thought it was a pressure sore. We left the helmet off that night. the next morning we went into the clinic and they told us it was heat rash. I was told when we first got it that he would sweat a lot more because it was like he was wearing a giant sweater on his head.

We were told to leave the helmet off of him until it healed.

Well, yesterday, day 7, I put it back on him in the morning, b/c the spot appeared healed. When I took it off that night, he had a new spot on his check. So, we had to leave it off last night.

I am beginning to wonder if he is ever going to get to wear it or if we just donated $3000 to Cranial Technologies. I am getting a little frustrated, especially since he is already almost 8 months old.

Apparently Nathan has very light, sensitive skin, just like me.

On a different note, Dan has been working on painting the helmet. Apparently you can't just paint it because of the type of material it is, so he had to kind of scoff the outside to get the paint to stick, He then painted it and put a clear coat on it. Needless to say, this is a lot more work than most. the majority of the patients put stickers or wrap the helmet in vinyl. Of course, Dan had to do it professional style!!

Here are a few picture when it was just plain white. IT was very medical looking.

AND, HERE IS THE FINISHED PRODUCT!!!

TA-DA!!!

WE (umm...mostly Dan) chose the red bull theme, as it is associated with his favorite Formula One car racing team with the glorious Sebastian Vettel!Also, Red Bull sponsors the Red Bull Air Races. It is were planes have to go compete for time through an obstacle course over water and through pylons. I have to admit, it is pretty cool to watch. We have Nathan doing Red Bull air training in his swing!

Anyways, that is were the theme came from.

I think it turned out really well. It does not look medical anymore and it adds personality.

Here is a side shot.

And the back. Notice the way Dan signed it! (Love dad) so precious.

They also shaved more of the helmet from his eyes. Before, he could barely see, because it dipped down into his sight of vision.

He really has been overall happy in his helmet (notice the happy slobber), since the blister has healed. There are times when he still pulls at it, but mostly it does not seem to bother him.

The bad thing is I have to keep him cool until his body adjusts to the heat from the helmet. OS, n cute clothes for a while, onesie's only and we have to keep it cooler in the house (YEAH!!! for me, Poor Dan!)

Very creative and talented artist!

I know some people may think we are being to vain, but if you know us you know that is not true. We just want what is best for our son.

I will keep you updated as we go throughout this journey. Hopefully we will stop having skin issues and he can just wear it and get it over with. (yes, Rachel, I know I ended my sentence in a preposition!)

7 months (3 weeks late!)

7 Months Already!

Nathan continues to grow and time continues to pass quickly.

SOme highlights of this past month include Nathan sitting by himself for long periods of time. He was toppling over a month ago, but now I can just sit him down and know he won't tip over.

He also moves around so much more at night. He scooches himself into the corner of the crib with his "back scoot". The bad thing is he wakes up in the middle of the night with his head jammed into the corner and he startes to fuss. All we have to do is put him back in the middle of the crib and he goes back to sleep, but I don't like having to get up at 1am and 4 am. I am not sure how we can break him of this bad habit! We find him sleeping more on his stomach too, which we never thought would happen because of his adverseness to tummy time for so long!

He continues to be such a happy baby. He has this little "pig squeal" he makes when he is really happy. It is adorable!

He loves to play with his toys and now I can set him down for a little while and he can entertain himself with his toys!

He is getting closer to crawling! He will get up on all fours and rock back and forth. He just has not made any forward movements! It is so funny how fast he changes. One day we put him on his tummy and he got up on all 4's ,just like that! So I am assuming one day he will just decide to start crawling!

One of his favorite things is bath time! Dan ussually gives him his batah and they have so much fun splashing and playing! Nathan still loves to put EVERYTHING in his mouth, as shown above.

He is growing so fast and I love every minute of it! (even the times in the middle of the night when I am exhausted) I am just thankful to have this wonderful and prescious little boy who I love more than I could ever imagine was possible! I am not a very emotional person but somettimes my heart feels like it is going to explode with love for this little boy and it brings true tears to my eyes. If I, in my imperfect sin nature, can love someone this much, how much more must out Heavenly Father love us? I can not even fathom!!

I have gone back to part-time at work and I really enjoy the extra time it gives me with NAthan at home. Some days we struggle to find things to dao but it is a joy to watch hime play and learn new things and i am grateful to be a part of it!

My next post will be on our difficult descion and journey to put Nathan in a helmet to correct ot his head.....stay tuned!

Aquraium

I was "bored" (such relative term when you have a child) one day, really I just wanted to get out of the house , so Dan and I took Nathan to the Aquarium.

He loved it! I figured he would because he spends alot of time watching our fish at home, in a 60 gallon tank.

To begin the day we bought an umbrella stroller. I love my BOB stroller but it is the size of a tank, so it is nice to have something smaller for occasions like this.

He started kicking and "talking" like crazy when we went into the aquarium. I wish I had the video camera, it was adorable. Note to self....take it next time!!

I really think we could have parked him in front of this giant tank, left him there for the day and picked him up before bed time! (I guess that would warrant a CPS consult huh?)! He was very content and happy just watching the fish swim up to him and looking at all the different colors on the fish.

He watched this little fish so intently. It would swim up to the glass and Nathan would get so excited! He would kick his legs and bang his little hands on the glass (sorry fish!)

Dan was giving him a lesson on the different types of fish....Seriously, we would walk up to a tank, Dan would take on look and be able to name not just the type of fish but the specific name! I guess it helps he has a biology/zoology major! I hope Nathan realizes and appreciates how smart his daddy is!

Nathan really liked these types of tanks were you could stand up and be surrounded by fish!!

This was the giant sting-ray tank. The sting ray would swim right up to Nathan, he loved it!!

Dan and I had alot of fun too!!

I went ahead and bought an annual pass, as it pays for itself in 2 visits, and Nathan gets in for free. I figured we will get lots of use this winter and on days were we just need out of the house!!

I have an overdue 7 month post coming soon!